The Room by Joshua Harris

In that place between wakefulness and dreams, I found myself in the room. There were no distinguishing features save for the one wall covered with small index-card files. They were like the ones in libraries that list titles by author or subject in alphabetical order. But these files, which stretched from floor to ceiling and seemingly endlessly in either direction, had very different headings. As I drew near the wall of files, the first to catch my attention was one that read "Girls I Have Liked." I opened it and began flipping through the cards. I quickly shut it, shocked to realize that I recognized the names written on each one.

And then without being told, I knew exactly where I was. This lifeless room with its small files was a crude catalog system for my life. Here were written the actions of my every moment, big and small, in a detail my memory couldn't match.

A sense of wonder and curiosity, coupled with horror, stirred within me as I began randomly opening files and exploring their content. Some brought joy and sweet memories; others a sense of shame and regret so intense that I would look over my shoulder to see if anyone was watching. A file named "Friends" was next to one marked "Friends I Have Betrayed."

The titles ranged from the mundane to the outright weird. "Books I Have Read," "Lies I Have Told," "Comfort I Have Given," "Jokes I Have Laughed At." Some were almost hilarious in their exactness: "Things I've Yelled at My Brothers." Others I couldn't laugh at: "Things I Have Done in My Anger," "Things I Have Muttered Under My Breath at My Parents." I never ceased to be surprised by the contents. Often there were many more cards than I expected. Sometimes fewer than I hoped.

I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of the life I had lived. Could it be possible that I had the time in my 20 years to write each of these thousands or even millions of cards? But each card confirmed this truth. Each was written in my own handwriting. Each signed with my signature.

When I pulled out the file marked "Songs I Have Listened To," I realized the files grew to contain their contents. The cards were packed tightly, and yet after two or three yards, I hadn't found the end of the file. I shut it, shamed, not so much by the quality of music, but more by the vast amount of time I knew that file represented.

When I came to a file marked "Lustful Thoughts," I felt a chill run through my body. I pulled the file out only an inch, not willing to test its size, and drew out a card. I shuddered at its detailed content. I felt sick to think that such a moment had been recorded.

An almost animal rage broke on me. One thought dominated my mind: "No one must ever see these cards! No one must ever see this room! I have to destroy them!" In an insane frenzy I yanked the file out. Its size didn't matter now. I had to empty it and burn the cards. But as I took it at one end and began pounding it on the floor, I could not dislodge a single card. I became desperate and pulled out a card, only to find it as strong as steel when I tried to tear it

Defeated and utterly helpless, I returned the file to its slot. Leaning my forehead against the wall, I let out a long, self-pitying sigh. And then I saw it. The title bore "People I Have Shared the Gospel With." The handle was brighter than those around it, newer, almost unused. I pulled on its handle and a small box not more than three inches long fell into my hands. I could count the cards it contained on one hand.

And then the tears came. I began to weep. Sobs so deep that they hurt started in my stomach and shook through me. I fell on my knees and cried. I cried out of shame, from the overwhelming shame of it all. The rows of file shelves swirled in my tear-filled eyes. No one must ever, ever know of this room. I must lock it up and hide the key.

But then as I pushed away the tears, I saw Him. No, please not Him. Not here. Oh, anyone but Jesus.

I watched helplessly as He began to open the files and read the cards. I couldn't bear to watch His response. And in the moments I could bring myself to look at His face, I saw a sorrow deeper than my own. He seemed to intuitively go to the worst boxes. Why did He have to read every one?

Finally He turned and looked at me from across the room. He looked at me with pity in His eyes. But this was a pity that didn't anger me. I dropped my head, covered my face with my hands and began to cry again. He walked over and put His arm around me. He could have said so many things. But He didn't say a word. He just cried with me.

Then He got up and walked back to the wall of files. Starting at one end of the room, He took out a file and, one by one, began to sign His name over mine on each card.

"No!" I shouted rushing to Him. All I could find to say was "No, no," as I pulled the card from Him. His name shouldn't be on these cards. But there it was, written in red so rich, so dark, so alive. The name of Jesus covered mine. It was written with His blood.

He gently took the card back. He smiled a sad smile and began to sign the cards. I don't think I'll ever understand how He did it so quickly, but the next instant it seemed I heard Him close the last file and walk back to my side. He placed His hand on my shoulder and said, "It is finished."

I stood up, and He led me out of the room. There was no lock on its door. There were still cards to be written.

Voluntary Slave

Romans 616 Don’t you realize that you become the slave of whatever you choose to obey? You can be a slave to sin, which leads to death, or you can choose to obey God, which leads to righteous living. 17 Thank God! Once you were slaves of sin, but now you wholeheartedly obey this teaching we have given you. 18 Now you are free from your slavery to sin, and you have become slaves to righteous living. 19 Because of the weakness of your human nature, I am using the illustration of slavery to help you understand all this. Previously, you let yourselves be slaves to impurity and lawlessness, which led ever deeper into sin. Now you must give yourselves to be slaves to righteous living so that you will become holy. 20 When you were slaves to sin, you were free from the obligation to do right. 21 And what was the result? You are now ashamed of the things you used to do, things that end in eternal doom. 22 But now you are free from the power of sin and have become slaves of God. Now you do those things that lead to holiness and result in eternal life. 23 For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord.There is so much to talk about in these passages of scripture. The main point that I see is that there is no escaping this fact: we are slaves. We are either slaves to sin or to Christ; slaves to death or life. Death is merely the absence of life. Jesus said He is the way, the truth, and the LIFE. Take away Jesus (the life) and you're left with death.When we live life our own way and leave God out of it we are making a huge mistake. We become slaves of sin. If you don't believe me, just be honest and ask yourself this question: has there ever been something in your life that you have struggled with but you can't seem to overcome it? For example, you don't want to start a relationship with someone because deep in your heart you know that person is no good for you, but you do it anyways and end up getting hurt. God has a better plan. Become His slave. Being a slave may not sound appealing, but there is no way around it. Why not choose to be a slave of the Master who will never force His will on you? This is on a volunteer basis. If you choose to be His slave, you must live by His rules.... This post got really long. I may have to do a 2nd part to continue with the rest of the wonderful truths found in Romans 6

More Money More Problems

"When I win the lottery, I will be able to do everything I've ever wanted to do." This was a conversation between a friend and I. This friend has played the lottery for a long time now: every Wednesday and Saturday for the past years to be exact. I couldn't help but feel a bit sad. It was so easy to see that his hopes and dreams rested on guessing a series of numbers in order to win millions of dollars. Well, what if he never wins? He would have spent so much time, money, and effort for nothing. His dreams and happiness rest on him becoming rich by winning the lottery. What is he does win? Statistics show that most people who win the lottery spend it all within the first few years. He will be able to travel the world and buy pretty much whatever he wants; but then what? Is that really what life is about? People who place their hope in money just end up being let down. I was never a millionaire, but my parents were good stewards of their money. We had a good life; nice car, nice house, nice family trips. All of a sudden these things were gone. My parents divorced, we lost the house, and we ended up living with my uncle. We went from being a middle class family to a low class family. I learned the hard way that money comes and goes. So many people's dreams and happiness depend on money. Just turn on the radio and you will hear a bunch of songs about money and material things. My happiness and joy does not rest on something as unstable and temporary as money. I can't help but think of my life verse to help illustrate what has been my key to happiness and satisfaction: Psalm 37:4 Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Is It Worth It?

Have you struggled many times asking yourself, "is it worth it?"


There are many questions that you may have had to ask yourself:
Is it worth giving up everything to follow after Jesus?
Is it worth surrendering your life to Him?
Is it worth denying yourself and taking up your cross?


The recent one I have asked myself is:
Is it worth taking a stand for righteousness?


Righteousness means:
acting in accord with divine or moral law : free from guilt or sin


Matthew 5:10
Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.


What? Did Jesus really mean that? We can face persecution for the sake of righteousness? By doing the right thing, by acting righteously, we will suffer?


How about the age-old question: Why do bad things happen to good people?


Let's look at the story of Joseph to illustrate how this righteousness thing works. Joseph was sold by his brothers into slavery and ended up in Egypt. Potiphar, the man that bought him as a slave, had him work at his house. Potiphar's wife had the hots for Joseph and tried to seduce him on several occasions. One day Joseph and Potiphar's wife are home alone and she tries to get him to sleep with her, but Joseph runs away. She accuses him of trying to rape her and Joseph gets thrown into jail...


Let's pause the story for a moment. It seems like God is being unfair. God allowed Joseph to be sold into slavery and then thrown into jail for a crime he did not commit. Joseph took a stand for righteousness and look where he ended up: in jail. Had Joseph simply slept with Potiphar's wife, he would not have had to suffer the way he did; or so we may think.


Joseph was upright and did not sleep with Potiphar's wife. She set him up and he went to jail, but God was still with him. I asked myself, what if Joseph had slept with Potiphar's wife? What would have happened to him? God would have left him. They could have gotten caught in the act, and as punishment he still would have ended up in jail (without God's protection), or he could have been given the death penalty.


I am certain Joseph would have preferred a life-time of slavery or prison before sinning against God. He was in chains, but he was at peace with God.


Isaiah 57:2
Those who walk uprightly enter into peace; they find rest as they lie in death.


Think about that the next time you have to make the choice between standing up for righteousness (doing the right thing), or taking the easy way out.

A Closed Mouth and Silent Heart

My heart was hot within me; while I was musing, the fire burned. Then I spoke with my tongue.... --Psalm 39:3

Prayer among evangelical Christians is always in danger of degenerating into a glorified gold rush. Almost every book on prayer deals with the "get" element mainly. How to get things we want from God occupies most of the space. Now, we gladly admit that we may ask for and receive specific gifts and benefits in answer to prayer, but we must never forget that the highest kind of prayer is never the making of requests. Prayer at its holiest moment is the entering into God to a place of such blessed union as makes miracles seem tame and remarkable answers to prayer appear something very far short of wonderful by comparison.

Holy men of soberer and quieter times than ours knew well the power of silence. David said, "I was dumb with silence. I held my peace, even from good; and my sorrow was stirred. My heart was hot within me; while I was musing the fire burned; then spake I with my tongue." There is a tip here for God's modern prophets. The heart seldom gets hot while the mouth is open. A closed mouth before God and silent heart are indispensable for the reception of certain kinds of truth. No man is qualified to speak who has not first listened. The Set of the Sail, pp. 14-15 

"Lord, teach me to close my mouth. I love to preach; You've given me opportunities to teach; I'm called on to dispense advice and counsel. But the sitting in silence before You, with my mouth closed--I don't do nearly enough of that. Amen."

**A Devotional by A.W. Tozer**

Let's Help Abolish Slavery

It's a dirty subject, but we can't brush it under the rug as if it doesn't exist. The sad and dark truth is that today there are over 27,000,000 slaves in the world. Human beings are being exploited in record numbers. There are more slaves today than there has ever been in history. This is just unacceptable.

In honor of Human Trafficking Awareness Day I would like to help shed some light on this issue. Women, men, and even children are victimized in horrible ways. Women have no other choice but to work in sweat shops. They work 18-hour shifts at less than half of the minimum wage. Little girls are forced to prostitute themselves. After being tortured and raped, these little girls are taught how to sell sexual services to men. There are even documentaries that show brothels being raided and how little girls as young as 4 years of age offer sexual services and the prices. It is sickening.

For ways to become proactive in the fight against human trafficking:
CLICK HERE

Let's pray for God to raise up more organizations like the A21 Campaign. Let's pray for God to raise up godly men and women in government, in the United Nations, and the European Union that will take a stand against human trafficking.

Exciting Things Just Beyond the Horizon

So what exactly does 2012 hold in store for me? I don't know exactly, but I know God is preparing me for great and wonderful things this year.

I feel blessed to have been able to receive the New Year with the best family and friends a girl could ask for. For now I must prepare for my 30th birthday, med school applications, and missions trip to Costa Rica. There is no time to waste.

Stop Looking

On my drive back from work I was listening to a preaching from Pastor Tony Evans. God uses him a lot to speak into my life. "Stop looking and start living" was the motto of the preaching; refering to singles who need to stop looking for a partner and to simply get on with our lives and live it to the fullest. That deserves an AMEN as well as an OUCH.

I've always known that I need to just serve the Lord and let Him bring someone into my life in His perfect timing. After all, my life verse is Psalm 37:4. I just want to delight myself in Him and let Him give me the desires of my heart that are in sync with His heart. But when it comes to the subject of "relationships" it's tough to wait on Him. Especially when my flesh as well as my soul opposes what my spirit knows to be the godly thing to do.

However, I must say that I love the fact that God's ways are higher and contradictory to the ways of this world. While many of my friends and my family worry if I will ever find a man, I've stopped worrying about it. My little cousin even asked me the other day, "Jenny, will you ever have a boyfriend or kids?" According to many people I haven't found anybody because I'm doing it wrong. I should be out and about, meeting guys and testing the waters. No thanks. I'm actually learning to just wait on God and let Him be the one to write my love story, rather than me writing my own.

Ruth is my role model in this aspect. Ruth was just gleaning in the fields when she met the man God had for her. So I will continue serving the Lord, and allow God to bring that man into my life whenever He deems fit.

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Looking Ahead

I can't help but think about 2012 and how it is quickly approaching. 2012 looks to be a promising year in my life. But I must be EXTREMELY wise and careful in the decisions that I make. Waving good-bye to my 20's and actually looking forward to turning 30 next month.

Preparation for the MCAT is underway. My goal is to take the MCAT around May or June with the intention of becoming a med-school student in 2013. I must also shadow a physician and obtain recommendation letters for med-school. May God give me wisdom and grace in this process. There is no doubt in my mind that God will give me favor with the admissions office.

I am also going to work with a team from my church that will be going to Costa Rica on a missions trip in July. There is a lot of spiritual and physical preparation, as well as fund-raising to do.

The search for protégé's are also in effect. My heart is to lift up a great team for the communications department of my church's youth ministry. I have already started training people in using Photoshp and Final Cut Pro to create graphic design and video projects.

Family goals are also set. For my 30th birthday, I want travel to Puerto Rico to meet my little sister. She is 16 and I just found out this year about her. I always wanted a little sister and I was very happy to find out that I have one.

2012, I'm ready for you.

A Trip Back in Time

Good friends are hard to find. And I've found them :-)

My friend JP came up with the awesome concept of a 40's photoshoot with a group of us that have been friends for more than 10 years. It was fun to say the least.

Here are some pictures from the shoot.

Pictures taken by: Elba Dipp (Dipp Photography) and JP Cardona (Breakthru Productions). Two amazing photographers to say the least.

Blue is my new fav color

 

We know that pink is for awareness of breast cancer. We know that purple is for awareness of pancreatic cancer. What a lot of people don't know is that blue is the color for human trafficking. Blue is the color that raises awareness of the 27 million people that are trapped in the grip of slavery... The 100,000 woman and girls trafficked each day in the United States alone... The 1.2 million children trafficked for sexual exploitation... And the two children that are sold per minute into this veiled commodity. 

Jesus said, "You will know the Truth, and the Truth will set you free." (John 8:31-32)

 

 

***A POST TAKEN FROM MY FRIEND RYLIE'S BLOG***

 

Romance; God's Way

I would like to start off by congratulating my dear friends Bobby and Carla. God has been putting together a beautiful love story in which you two are the main characters. Your example has encouraged and inspired me.

Not too long ago Carla would be talking to me about Bobby and how she was really starting to like Bobby. The lingering question "does he like me back?" would leave our conversations in suspense. So as a sister in Christ I would encourage her to pray and fast about it and just seek the Lord for guidance. When a girl starts letting a boy into her heart it could be something truly beautiful, or a disaster waiting to happen.

It turns out that Bobby was facing this same dilemma :-) hehe. He was interested in courting Carla, but he kept quiet for more than a year. I admire and respect him very much for waiting. Although he had feelings for her, he didn't act upon those feelings until God put everything into place and confirmed that He approved. It is extremely rare to find a guy, even a Christian one, that puts these feelings and desires aside in order to wait for God's confirmation. He didn't have to flirt with her and use pick up lines to get her attention. He prayed for her, and God answered his prayers. She didn't have to dress provacatively and use seduction in order to get his attention. As I said before, Bobby and Carla have been an example to me.

Yesterday Bobby and Carla announced in church that they are officially courting each other. I am extremely excited and happy for them. Courting is not a very popular idea, but it's definitely what you find all throughout the Bible. If you are curious to know more about courting I recommend "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" by Joshua Harris. Simply put, courting is a process in which a man and a woman get to know each other better, with the intentions of getting engaged and eventually marrying. Deciding who we marry is one of the most important decisions in our lives; second only to accepting Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. This is very different from dating.

Bobby and Carla understand that God has a special purpose for them as a couple. It goes beyond the way they feel about each other. There is a divine purpose in their relationship. May God use them to impact lives and to reach many many many souls with the Gospel.

God hates?

This weekend was a very special weekend in my life. Camp Arise was such a blessing. Words cannot express enough what God did in the lives of our youth.

 

In this camp our youth were able to experience a new dimension of worship. We praised God in spirit and in truth and the Holy Spirit moved powerfully. Young people were set free from oppression and delivered from self-destructive habits.

On Saturday morning we shared a devotional on God's love. To be honest, I've been Christin for thirteen years and have heard ALOT of messages on God's love. I myself have preached about God's love on many occasions; but never have I seen so clearly an aspect of God's love that He revealed to me at camp.

John 3:16 says that God so loved us... and I'm sure you know how the rest of the verse goes. He loved us so much that He gave of Himself and died on the cross for us. But God revealed a truth that pierced my heart and filled me with an even greater love and appreciation for Him.

2 Corinthians 5:21
For He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.

This verse shows us that when He died on the cross for us He became SIN. At first that may not seem like the huge deal that it truly is.

Deuteronomy 9:18 “Then, as before, I threw myself down before the Lord for forty days and nights. I ate no bread and drank no water because of the great sin you had committed by doing what the Lord hated, provoking him to anger.

The Lord HATES sin. There is absolutely nothing about sin that the Lord approves of. Yet, He was willing to be crucified and become the very thing He hates so that we may be free from sin. His love for us is so much greater than His hatred for sin. WOW. But let's not be mistaken in thinking that because God loves us He will not punish our sin. He most certainly will, but the remarkable thing is that in His death and resurrection He provided a way out. He paid the penalty for our sins. Now that's LOVE at it's very best. How can I know and experience this truly amazing love and continue to sin against God? I can't! This is why the Gospel is so powerful. God's love is transforming and liberating. His love compels us to live for Him and do only what is pleasing in His sight.

Showing love

People have approached me and told me that they really enjoy my blog posts. Each time, they made my day. I guess we are not always fully aware at how massive the internet is and the impact it has. Even when you can't see, people will be reading your blog. No pressure hehehe. I just laugh because it's always been the people I've least expected that come to my blog to read my posts. Feel free to comment and show some love on here :-)

I've met some really amazing people through this blog: missionaries, pastor's kids, etc. I've enjoyed connecting with each of you and reading your wonderful posts.

Well, for now I must continue working and preparing for camp coming up next weekend...

Just what the DOctor ordered

A child is sick and showing several alarming symptoms. Worried, the parents rush the child to the nearest hospital. At this point it is still very unsure exactly what the child has. I can't help but picture how many different ways this child can be treated, depending on what the doctor deems suitable.

There are two major branches of medicine (allopathic and osteopathic). An allopathic doctor is an M.D. and an osteopathic doctor is a D.O. In many cases both of these branches may have completely different approaches to treating the same disease.

I want to share with you my passion for the osteopathic approach to medicine. All of this started while observing my grandma's aging process. She takes over 15 different medications a day. The sad part is that she even has to take medications to counteract the side effects of the other medications. I am outraged at the fact that not only does she have to take all these pills, but she has to take them for life. I never agreed with that. What do people in Latin American countries do? I know for a fact they don't live off of pills the way we do here. For example, why is it so easy to prescribe a pill to lower your cholesterol? Wouldn't it be wise to boost your body's own natural mechanisms to combat disease? Wouldn't it be wise to prescribe a healthy diet that will eliminate harmful cholesterol? But being such a microwave culture, we want results quick and easy. We can take a pill to lower cholesterol levels, while continuing to eat junk and not exercising properly. We treat the symptoms, but seldom treat the root of the problem; the self-destructive habits we have that make us prone to so many diseases. I know I don't have much authority in this area. I don't eat healthy most of the time and I almost never exercise, but I have been making changes in this direction.

Sorry if this is too much of an outburst. As you can see, this is a very touchy subject for me. I am zealous about trying to getting people to change their attitudes towards medical care. Less prescription drugs, and more preventive and holistic techniques. True doctors understand how the body functions and can treat illnesses using the God-given resources available within the body itself. God designed us so intricately; and I can't wait to get into med-school and study the human body in more depth.

The Cost of Discipleship (She Smiles, She writes)

Let me start off by giving credit to my friend from She Smiles, She writes. This is a wonderful post that I just had to share.

“Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Won’t you first sit down and estimate the cost to see if you have enough money to complete it? For if you lay the foundation and are not able to finish it, everyone who sees it will ridicule you, saying, ‘This person began to build and wasn’t able to finish.’;

In the same way, those of you who do not give up everything you have cannot be my disciples."
Luke 14:28-30;33

The Cost of Discipleship is found in the first 4 books of the NT. Some Bible translations refer to these verses as "Discipleship will be difficult". Huh.

Pretend that you're looking for a job. You heard of this man, Jesus, who goes around healing people, speaking wisdom & saving souls. You hear that you can apply to be one of his disciples and you immediately believe this discipleship position is your dream job. You go online and download the application. The application states that every applicant has to have 2 prerequisites to qualify. 

1.  "If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even their own life—such a person cannot be my disciple." (Luke 14:26)
   This job requires a certain kind of person, someone who will hate his/her parents, siblings, spouse and children. The word hate in this context is just a Semitic expression for "loving less". If you can love all those people less, then maybe you have a chance. He adds, as if reading the minds of our 'me' generation, "yes, even [hate] your own life". Love yourself less!
   Crazy to think this is just prerequisite #1.
2. The next prerequisite goes along the lines us acquiring and bearing a cross. Imagine you go to a store and you find your own cross with your name on it. Jesus paid it for you, you just need to pick it up and THEN follow him. Trust me, you don't get very far following him without the cross.
   But what does this crucifixion metaphor mean? It means a disciple must die to self-will & embrace God's will, no matter the cost.  If His will means leaving your country to save orphans in Africa, you take up your cross and follow Christ on to Africa. If His will is for you to endure torture, persecution & die a martyr, you bear your cross and follow Christ until your last breath.

Now, if you think you have the prerequisites nailed, you fill the rest of your application. Once you reach the bottom, you notice that there is one last think you need to know before submitting the application: you must know how much this 'job' (more like lifestyle) will cost you.

"Well Savior, what's it going to cost me to call you my teacher, my master, my Lord ?" you ask.
His reply: "Everything. You must renounce to all."

As a potential disciple, you must always first count the cost in order to see if you will persevere in faith. If you're not willing to relinquish everything, you'll end up like the rich young man from Matthew 19. Jesus gave him the opportunity to be one of his close disciples (potential disciple #13). This young man was moral, keeping all the commandments, yet he asked the Lord what he was lacking still. "Renounce to your 'great possessions', give them to the poor and come follow me," Jesus answered (Matt. 19:22). This man could've brought the gospel to Asia, maybe even be the author of many books in the NT! But we will never know because he refused the invitation. And to think it was all because of what he 'owned' (If you're struggling with this, Jesus addressed materialism in Luke 12:13-21 & Luke 9:25). The young man went away sorrowful, probably knowing he would regret that decision.

Or you can be like those that, when they heard the invitation, "left everything & followed him" (Luke 5:11b). The Bible speaks of them as men who will inherit the kingdom of God, not because of them possessing any supernatural ability (they were as faulty as we are) but because they took up their cross and followed Christ.

These 3 conditions make up the commitment of every true follower of Christ. We've been taught to say/repeat a prayer to receive Christ as our Savior that often times don't really affect our everyday lives. We say the prayer and go back to our regular way of living all the while thinking 'we're saved'. The reality is that Christ died to be your Savior AND your Lord. There's a big difference.

I'm a disciple of Christ, a title I wear proudly that comes with desert & stormy seasons, modern-day Pharisees and betrayers, modern-day Judas you must love regardless. This is all part of the cost, to suffer with Christ.
 Yet I wouldn't trade it for the world. I will always love  the intimacy I have at the feet of Jesus more. The cost to know Him and make Him known is worth it.
But what about you? 
If you don't have the discipleship commitment and have called yourself a follower of Christ, renounce to the tittle immediately if you're not willing to bear your cross. You cannot love Him less.

If you want to accept Christ as your Savior AND Lord, run and seek Him as fast as you can! Repent of your erroneous way of living, pick up your cross and follow Him. He is waiting for you as we speak.

"For me, to live is Christ and to die is gain."
Phillippians 1:21

InDesign fun

I just wanted to share a bit of the work I do for the youth group in my church. I run the communications department of the youth ministry, which oversees different ways of keeping our kids up to date with what is going on in the ministry. Part of the communications department is creating a monthly newsletter that is given to the youth. This is October's newsletter.

I welcome tips and suggestions for future newsletters.

Testimony

God spoke this to my heart in a supernatural way today. "There's no test-imony without a test". These past few years have been periods of tests, and then those tests turning into a testimony. I was just never able to appreciate it in that way before. As I was in God's presence today I just broke down and had to give Him thanks for everything that He is doing. I realized that it has been very easy for me to thank God for helping me when I am going through a trial, but I have not been able to thank God for the trial itself. When the rough times in my life are over I breathe a sigh of relief, but as long as I am still in a rough moment, it is sooo hard for me to rest and know that God is in the midst of the storm with me. You would think that after walking with God for so long, this would come easy and natural to me. Not so. I am reminded of the stubborn Israelites. After having seen miracle after miracle, they continuously fell into despair and would want to go running back to Egypt at the slightest opposition they would encounter. I would think, "foolish Israelites." How could they doubt God when He just finished proving to them that He would provide and take care of them? Then I realized that I would fall into the same trap. What I have learned in this is that I cannot depend on past victories or miracles to make it through a current trial that I am going through. I have to seek God and cling to Him knowing that there are new victories and miracles awaiting me as I go through a new trial.

Seeing what my family has been going through and what I have been personally experiencing has taken a  toll on me. I've had to ask God for a new measure of strength and faith. And to my delight, He has given it to me today. For the past couple of weeks God has been putting 2 teenage girls and 2 marriages on my heart very strongly. What God was compelling me to do was to invite the two teenage girls to the youth camp my church is hosting in November, and to pray and fast for two marriages. Today I was able to speak to the parents of the teenage girls, and to my amazement, the parents despite not being Christian, were very enthusiastic about letting their daughters go to camp. Praise God. Now I have to put these girls in prayer and fast for God to use camp weekend to draw them to Him. Today I was also able to speak to my friend, and to my amazement, she is working things out with her husband. They were on the brink of divorce and I was praying and fasting for their marriage to be restored. This deserves another "PRAISE GOD!" So in the midst of a rough season in my life, today was filled with victory and a glimmer of hope.

I just want to leave you with a song from Jesus Culture that is very fitting for everything that God has made more real to me today.

Human Interaction

How wonderful that we get to share our lives with other people. Family, friends, neighbors, co-workers... How blessed we are to be surrounded by people. However, I didn't always think this way. I look back at my school days in elementary, middle, and high school. I didn't have too many friends. I was always shy and awkward. Ask my brother. After school was out, he would always wait a while and make sure I had already started walking home before he would start walking home. He didn't want people to see him with me, and he didn't even want people to know I was his sister. How could a popular guy be seen with a shy and weird girl?... even if it was his sister. Ok, I went off on a tangent. But there is a point I am trying to make.

Fast forward 15 years... I am still a bit shy and truth be told, I am still a bit weird. However, what has completely changed is my view of human interaction. As a teen, I wasn't looking to make friends and hang out and have fun. I didn't care to make friends. But that all changed when Christ came into my heart. God began showing me how special every single person is to Him. He even knows the number of hairs on everybody's head. So if God took the time to make everybody special and unique, then why can't I make a conscious effort to meet people and get to know them? As Christians we are called to do so.

My personal calling became evident in a vision that I had a few years ago. I still remember that I was sitting on the side of my bed and writing my thoughts down on paper. I was writing something between a poem and a devotional. I hope that makes sense. As I was writing God started showing me a bunch of people; some I could recognize and some I couldn't. Each person God showed me had a common characteristic. They were introverted, and outcast by most other people. In other words, they were "weird" people... just like me. And I suddenly understood why God gave me the personality and temperament that He did. I have a calling to reach out to people that are normally rejected and outcast by society. That is why I now say that it is a blessing to be surrounded by people: no matter how strange or different they seem, we are all God's creative handiwork.

What we're made Of

We were remembering with my pastor all the tough times that our church has been through. Indeed it is nothing short of a miracle that we are still standing. God has sustained us in a supernatural way.

One of the hardest times was back in 2003. All at once, the city closed down our church for over a year, my pastor's health deteriorated in Guatemala and he needed immediate surgery. We were left without a church and without a pastor. But even in this, we saw God's provision and care. Vida Abundante church opened up their doors and let us have our services there at night.

And this is the stuff we're made of. I love remembering how the church came together. Although we didn't have a building of our own, and the pastor was fighting for his life, God brought a unity in us that helped us get through this tough time.

I also think about the underground church in China. They are in constant persecution. They are arrested and tortured for their faith. Yet in all this, the underground church is growing exponentially. People are coming to Christ in record numbers. They even send missionaries around different parts of China and neighboring countries.

Jesus' words in Matthew 16:18 hold true.

Matthew 16:18
And I tell you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hades will not overcome it.